Finding Our Way Through the Holidays

Dec 5, 2025

Joyce Lee, LLMSW, Grief Counselor

For many of us, this holiday season may be the first one since losing a loved one. It may also be the first holiday season in a while that’s spent with extended family and friends.

Tradition

It’s not unexpected that a time of celebration of family and togetherness can amplify grief and shine a spotlight on the absence of someone dearly missed. It’s normal that this mix of emotions may seem overwhelming. There may be a lot that has changed this holiday season. Traditions that once felt comforting may now feel bittersweet, and gatherings can highlight the absence of someone who is deeply missed. It’s common for grief to feel sharper during the holidays, and acknowledging and naming this feeling is an important first step in caring for yourself.

Comfort

Comfort may look different with the presence of grief. Some people find comfort in keeping familiar traditions, while others may prefer to change things entirely. Do only what will feel supportive and comfortable as there is no right or wrong answer. You might decide to honor your loved one by lighting a candle, cooking a favorite recipe, or sharing a meaningful memory. Or you may choose to simplify plans, create new rituals, or step away from certain events that feel overwhelming. Giving yourself permission to do what feels manageable is essential.

Gatherings

Social expectations can also add pressure during this season. If attending social gatherings feels difficult, it’s okay to set boundaries, drive separately, have an exit plan for the gathering, or politely decline. Let others know what you need or what you can realistically participate in. Grief takes energy, and it’s important to listen to your own limits.

During this time, it is important to build in moments of self-care and prioritizing this as social gatherings can often utilize a lot of energy and opportunities to reset and to recharge, is essential. Taking a quiet walk, practicing deep breathing, journaling, or spending time with someone who truly understands your loss can help ground you when emotions feel heavy.

Self Care

Most importantly, be kind and gentle with yourself. Grief and joy may coexist throughout this season, and this is normal. By honoring your needs, creating space for your feelings, and connecting with supportive people, you can move through the holidays in a way that is meaningful and manageable for you.

 

FOR MORE ON GRIEF AND LOSS, VISIT OUR GRIEF CARE PAGE.

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